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10 comments
Fladnag 31

I don't understand the action.

In the previous page Hayze just enter the room behind the killer, but when he raise again, I see him run away.
Why he doesn't jump on the killer back ?

In fact, I can't find a logical position where Hayze-Killer distance is more than Hayze-Alex distance.

(french reader, sorry for mistakes ;o)

Fladnag 06/17/2013 15:01:00   
gobes 19
Team

Ouch, good point... I thought I had an explanation, but the dresser on the left of the first case bothers me. See page 16, Hayze run hiding on the opposite side than Aex. On the previous page, When the killer get shot, the view angle change to be in front of Hayze, then come back to the previous position... The action is a bit complicated here :/

gobes 06/17/2013 15:16:42   
Fladnag 31

Yes, the dresser doesn't exist in the previous page, but it don't matter, it's probably a matrix reboot ^^

When the killer is shot, always in previous page, the last two boxes seems to show Alex's view : the killer is lied down on his left side.
So, if it's Alex's view, Alex-Killer-Hayze was almost aligned, so when Hayze run back... where he's going ?!

Fladnag 06/17/2013 15:46:31   
gobes 19
Team

Page 16: on the last panel you see him going in a hallway. I think he's going there.

gobes 06/17/2013 16:03:21   
ADT 5

after all the conversation cant it be that
hayze could have overpowered the robo-type creature from behind instead of surprisingly coming on the frontline

ADT 06/18/2013 05:34:24   
ImagineTheEnding 5
Author

He could have when the soldier was standing in front of Aex, back turned to Hayze. But, again he would be risking his life in the process. He is unaware of the equipment the soldier has on. He has no idea how powerful the soldier is or what would need to be done to take him out.

He could twist or slit the soldier's throat, but he doesn't want to kill him. The fact that he doesn't want to do that is the sticky part. This soldier can climb great heights, jump great heights, and the helmet can take a direct hit. This is shocking to Jin and Hayze.

Mostly the reason as to why Hayze failed was because of his over confidence and then sudden fear when it didn't go his way. He wasn't prepared for the worst thing to happen. This is why Jin was so annoyed with Hayze before and rolled his eyes when Jin persisted to run away. Jin felt like it was much safer just to run than to fight a foreign creature blindly.

Once again, this is my fault that the scene is confusing. I failed to make all of these variables clear in the paneling which is what makes the scene so unrealistic.

ImagineTheEnding 06/18/2013 06:23:29   
Fladnag 31

Ok, thanks for explanations ;o)
Don't give up, this is a great story, I'm just too perfectionist sometimes ^^

Fladnag 06/19/2013 09:11:35   
ImagineTheEnding 5
Author

No it's fine. It means you're taking the story seriously and that you care enough to point out something you don't think works. You're not insulting me or anything and I'm not offended.

ImagineTheEnding 06/19/2013 18:01:36   
ADT 5

make it a 2 way wall
such that as soon as hayze hid himself he appeared from behind the dresser from a gap


P.S. you online?

ADT 06/18/2013 07:30:56   
ImagineTheEnding 5
Author

I'm not online no. Maybe I could do that? What has been done in the comic is done. I'm not going to make any changes.

ImagineTheEnding 06/19/2013 06:48:41   
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