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manx10:

“WANTED Masculine blue collar alpha male, mid-30s. My son’s grades are slipping and I feel it is because he does not have appropriate respect for cock. Sadly, my own penis is of average length and girth, and I am unable to provide the type of repercussions that young men need to excel. Ideally you are 6 feet tall, with a large, girthy cock in need of release. Come over after work, and skip the shower. Provide direct and meaningful orifice mentorship to my son for the rest of the night, as desired. $250 (Possible ongoing role.)”